I've had the same conversation with a number of women, all about my age, all with young children and busy husbands. I found out that we are all struggling with the same thing. How to balance it all out. How do you have a clean house, errands ran, children engaged with you and spending time with them, husband satisfied (and I don't mean just in the bedroom), church callings fullfilled, work, and then find a spare minute or two for yourself, plus a hundred other things?
I have also learned that each one of us is usually pretty good if not great at doing at least one of these things. For myself I believe that I'm pretty good at doing activities with my kids, (when none of the other stuff gets in the way.) Although I'm a horrible housekeeper, as anyone who has showed up at my house unannounced can attest to. But that's the point, I'm so busy trying to be good at all of those things I'm not being great at the one thing which I know I am. And the end result is that I do everything sub par.
So, back to the conversations. One subject was brought up. If Christ were to walk in my house right now, what would he think???? Is cleanliness close to godliness, or would he rather see 4 happy children making handprint turkeys and a cluttery, toy strewn house? I don't pretend to know the answers to these questions, but in preparing for my young women's lesson on change, I found these quotes from President Monson from a talk given during last October's conference, it's entitled "Finding Joy in the Journey."
-If you are still in the process of raising children, be aware that the tiny fingerprints that show up on almost every newly cleaned surface, the toys scattered about the house, the piles and piles of laundry to be tackled will disappear all too soon and that you will—to your surprise—miss them profoundly.
-Day by day, minute by minute, second by second we went from where we were to where we are now. The lives of all of us, of course, go through similar alterations and changes. The difference between the changes in my life and the changes in yours is only in the details. Time never stands still; it must steadily march on, and with the marching come the changes.
-“When I was around thirteen and my brother ten, Father had promised to take us to the circus. But at lunchtime there was a phone call; some urgent business required his attention downtown. We braced ourselves for disappointment. Then we heard him say [into the phone], ‘No, I won’t be down. It’ll have to wait.’
“When he came back to the table, Mother smiled. ‘The circus keeps coming back, you know,’ [she said.]
“‘I know,’ said Father. ‘But childhood doesn’t.’”2
-Let us relish life as we live it, find joy in the journey, and share our love with friends and family. One day each of us will run out of tomorrows.
-Said one well-known author: “Both abundance and lack [of abundance] exist simultaneously in our lives, as parallel realities. It is always our conscious choice which secret garden we will tend . . . when we choose not to focus on what is missing from our lives but are grateful for the abundance that’s present—love, health, family, friends, work, the joys of nature, and personal pursuits that bring us [happiness]—the wasteland of illusion falls away and we experience heaven on earth.”6
I love these quotes. Pres. Monson tells us to rejoice in the mess for one day they will be gone and we'll miss them. Childhood is only a blink of time in our lives. All too soon the messy little children will be grown up and gone. I know that I have to teach my children the lesson of a clean house, so they have chores and I'll keep trying to keep the house a managle mess. But as the prophet says they will be grown and gone all too soon, and when they are, I want them to look back on their childhood and remember those handprint turkeys, the paper plate spiders, home made pinata's, the wrestling matches, the times we made meals together and they spilled the whole thing on the floor or got eggs in the batter and mom laughed.
I would never judge another woman in the raising of their children. It is the hardest job on this earth. God gave women the ability to bare his spirit children and to care for them. To teach them and love them. It's my hope that we can all concentrate on the things we are great at, but keep working on the things where we struggle and that we can help each other in areas where one is more accomplished than another. And by doing that we may all be able to enjoy our little ones a little more.
I love all the women in my life. You each teach me something. You are all great at something and I love learning from you. I hope I offer something in return. Here's a pat on the back for being wonderful women, wives and mothers. Keep up the good work.
